My Two Cents

This is my final post. I hope that you have enjoyed reading my articles over the last six months as much as I have enjoyed writing them.  I am pursuing a career as a freelance writer and must sign off for now to focus my attention on that endeavor. I appreciate beyond words the encouragement, feedback, ideas and support that many of you have given. I encourage each of you to find ways to fulfill the dreams you have for your life and I thank each of you for sharing in and contributing to an important passage in my journey.

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My younger sister started a tradition at one our “girl’s nights” some years ago.  She calls it “switch and swap” and I think it is an innovative way to systemize a practice that many people participate in but perhaps have not enjoyed its full potential. 

For instance, women will often give a friend a pair of shoes that didn’t work for them or maybe a pair of earrings that proved too uncomfortable.  Well, why not make a habit of it? 

Though the name implies a trade, “switch and swap” is more like a give-away instead of any sort of measured or precise exchange.  It’s simple, you arrive at the party with things you don’t want and you leave with “new” things that you are really excited about.  The benefits are four-fold.

First, you rid yourself of an item that was an energy drain – the guilt of the wasted money spent, the precious space it takes in your home, the constant obligation to hold on to it “in case you need it some day” but that day never comes and even if it does you have forgotten you had it so the day passes while the item remains unused and hidden in an overcrowded closet.

Second, you get to see someone enjoy the thing that has been your albatross – and you get to leave the party without it!  Thirdly, someone at the party may have the necklace that you have been searching for to match that shirt with the unusual neckline that you love.  It is “one woman’s trash is another woman’s treasure” in action!  

And, finally, it’s FREE! So, financially speaking, this is a smart move.  It’s like shopping – which I detest by the way – without the parking or crowds and without spending a dime!  And anybody can do it, with any items.  Have a couples party or even include the kids and bring tools you bought for one project and never used again, books you’ve read once or never (and that was enough), toys your children have outgrown or never touched, ill-advised QVC purchases, furniture that you no longer like or have a place for, horrid gifts from people who apparently don’t know you that well.

My sister likes to draw numbers and take turns making our selections to cut down on any two people spotting the same item at the same time.  Luckily, we’ve managed to avoid any Blue Light Special brawls even when we’ve not taken such an organized approach.  Find what works for you, have fun with it, make a habit of it and save money in the process!

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As a member of the National Association of Women in Construction, I had the pleasure of speaking at the organization’s May meeting.  My presentation consisted of a summary of the blogs I’ve written over the last six months; the theme of which has been that women need to take responsibility for their financial lives and future because – say it with me now – it is up to us and no one else.

I was touched by the several women who approached me after the meeting to share profound stories of their financial histories.   Each of them excitedly told me of the lasting impact of a dramatic turning point, or the encouragement or example of a loved one that influenced their financial philosophy for the better.

Lois*, a woman in her sixties, marveled at the foresight of her mother who made sure that Lois completed her high school education in spite of her father’s horrifying dictum that she was to quit school and get a job until she, inevitably, married.  Lois’ mother pulled her aside and said, “You will finish school” and she did.  It is even more remarkable because Lois was the youngest of ten children and her mother scraped together secret savings to pay for Lois’ books.

Hillary* expressed her gratitude that her late husband had the vision and compassion to leave an organized and secure estate behind for her so that she could more easily pick up the pieces after his emotionally devastating death.  He had even made his own funeral arrangements which eased her burden so greatly that now she has done the same.  She tells her adult children with a knowing look, “You will thank me for that one day”.

And as I reached the parking lot to leave that night, Betty* exclaimed, “I did the right thing!  Thank you for telling me I did the right thing!”.  She referenced the story I told of my mother wisely declining my request for a loan when I was newly out on my own.  Betty said she felt vindicated for having done the same thing with her daughter that very week.  As my mother did for me, she encouraged her daughter to figure her own way out of her trouble.  Now the daughter knows, as I too learned, that her mother not only loves her, but most importantly, believes in her.

Each of these deeply personal struggles resulted in triumphs for these women.  For all the good feelings that the evening brought, I was most excited to be in a room full of women engaged in a discussion about finances!  I am not implying this never happens but unless you are a member of a women’s investment group or a professional women’s business association who gather exclusively for this purpose, this is not the norm.  Let’s make this the norm – let us get comfortable talking about finances!

*Names have been changed.

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I hope that you will check-out or purchase one of these books and take it to the beach or to the pool with you this summer.  Then pass it along to another woman in your life.  Let’s encourage each other to be financially educated, engaged and independent.

Your Money or Your Life  by Joe Dominguez and Vicki Robin

I read this book about every three years and ignites inspiration each time.  Based on some of the lessons in this book, my husband and I paid off our mortgage in five years.  It is a step-by-step guide to understanding your relationship with money and it is life-changing.

The Feminine Mistake  by Leslie Bennetts I read this book as soon as it came out in April of this year.  It has galvanized my belief that women must be financially self-sufficient throughout their lives.  Ms. Bennetts does a great job of illustrating the potentially devastating downside of financial passivity among women.Rich Dad Poor Dad  by Robert T. Kiyosaki & Sharon L. LechterMy favorite quote from this book is “Work to learn, not to earn”.  Mr. Kiyosaki suggests that if we follow our natural curiosity and let it shape our career, we are more likely to become successful than if we just chase money and security.   

The Number  by Lee Eisenberg This book will let you know that you are not alone in the struggle to quantify, “How much is enough for retirement?”.  It is an easy and enjoyable read that provides glimpses into the lives of some fascinating people who have defined “the number” for themselves.The Money Book for the Young, Fabulous & Broke  by Suze Orman

This is a specific “how to” financial manual designed for people in their 20’s and 30’s but I think anyone would learn a great deal from it – I did.  Ms. Orman is also quite a motivator so it is worth reading just to get that kick in the pants you may need!�

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After two weeks in Cali, Colombia visiting my husband’s family and friends, I am both more in love with Cali and more in love with my own hometown of Columbia, South Carolina. No matter how exciting and enriching it is to wander far from your daily routine, there is nothing like dropping your suitcase and hopping into your own bed!